I've been waiting for this moment for all my life. (Oh Lord.)

If you were sitting in a room filled with random people from your past and you had to choose one person along with a song to which that person is required to dance, would you humiliate someone by making them dance to a song like Crazy Little Thing Called Love by Queen (no one looks good when they dance to that song), or would you match your chosen person with a song that complements their style with the hope that someone will do the same for you when choosing your dancing song?

I always play music while I'm getting ready in the morning, mostly from a playlist I created titled May I Have Some?, which holds 665 songs and is 42 hours and 17 minutes long. (Please don't tell me how playlists are supposed to be curated. Everything I do is done deliberately.) I have never been a person who dances, but if I was required to dance, I would be okay with dancing to any of the 665 songs from May I Have Some?.

This morning I took a left turn and listened to an Apple Music playlist titled ‘80s Soft Rock Essentials. As the music played, I started thinking about the room filled with my people, and I began to dance (because you should always be prepared, and you never know, and better safe than sorry, and don't get caught with your pants down).

Here is a list of the ‘80s soft rock essentials to which I danced while getting ready this morning:
The Best of Times by Styx: I felt a little awkward dancing to this song, because I was including shoulder rolls that I don't believe conveyed what Styx had in mind when they performed the song back in 1981. (Did you know that Dennis DeYoung wrote the song as an expression of the fear felt in America after Reagan was elected in 1980? Forty five years later, I still know all of the words and HOLY SHIT I CAN RELATE TO THE FEAR! GAH! I, too, wish the summer winds could bring back paradise, Dennis DeYoung!)

The Way It Is by Bruce Hornsby & The Range: I've hated this song since the first time I heard it back in 1986, but I can dance to it if you make me. (If you're curious, other songs I hate from the ‘80s include You Belong to the City by Glenn Frey, Lady in Red by Chris de Burgh, and Into the Night by Benny Mardones—a song about a man in his 30s who wants to have sex with a minor.)

Time out. Have you seen the video of Tonight's the Night by Rod Stewart? Yeesh.

True Colors by Cyndi Lauper (Most of the movements during this dance came from my eyes instead of my arms, which I believe was a very effective decision. When my arms DID move, it was surprising. Eye-catching. Impactful.)

In the Air Tonight by Phil Collins (If you want to humiliate me, make me dance to this song. The tempo is impossible, so I found myself acting out the lyrics instead of cutting the rug. If anyone had seen my interpretation, they might assume I was making light of Phil Collins's painfully heavy situation. Very inappropriate.)